Our Seniors deserve love and respect; not scorn and contempt

Image from Office for Seniors Report (2015)

We are all conceived in love. From the moment of our birth, we are under the love, care, and kindness of our parents, till the time we get wings to fly away.

Later in life, do our parents enjoy the same love for their children?

They need care, understanding and support when they are old.

Poverty of loneliness

Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, and forgotten by their very own family is poverty of loneliness and a deep feeling of sadness that only parents who experience neglect, know what it is like.

Elder Abuse is a reality and happens in every religion, culture, ethnic and income groups.

This has got to do with our aged parents, who bring us up with many hardships, depriving themselves of the bare necessities, but making life easy for us. 

Many parents in the past believed that when they grow old, they can depend on their children for help. This is so true. But most of the time society fails them.

I am taking the opportunity of explaining Elder Abuse and why it is not OK and why it is unacceptable. This is the Elder Abuse Awareness Week at Shanti Niwas Charitable Trust. The World Elder Abuse Awareness Day is on June 15.

 
From Office for Seniors (Facebook)

A global problem

Elder abuse is an intentional act or failure to act that causes or creates a risk of harm to an older adult. An older adult is 60 years or older. It is a growing global problem.

There are thousands of cases of Elder Abuse each year, out of which, a majority goes unreported. Elder Abuse is a violation of Human Rights and a significant cause of injury, illness, isolation, and despair. Elder Abuse mostly affects elders who are frail and vulnerable and who depend on their family to meet their most basic needs.

What is Elder Abuse?

Elder Abuse is a single or repeated act and behaviour that causes harm or distress to an older person, occurring within any relationship where there is an expectation of trust. 

This is inflicted by any family member whom they trust. 

There are five types of Abuse, of which, four are paramount:  Psychological or Emotional Abuse, inflicting mental pain, anguish, or distress on an elder person through verbal or nonverbal acts, such as (1) ridiculing and humiliating (2) threatening and bullying (3) control, social isolation and prevention of choice, hostility, and lack of affection (4) feel unwanted and useless and (5) Being deprived to go out and meet friends and relations, shouting and intermediation. 

Suicidal tendencies

Elderly people lose their sense of belonging and become suicidal.

Financial Abuse, which can also be termed as Exploitation: An elderly is unaware of his/her privileges, such as; illegal or improper use of funds, property, and possessions without their permission, taking away their pension, jewellery, or items they cherish; misusing Power of Attorney; family keeping their debit/credit cards without their consent; scams that rely on establishing a relationship with the older person to exploit their savings or assets

Physical Abuse, inflicting pain or causing injury, including inappropriate use of force or restraint, for example: hitting, pushing or rough handling; Inappropriate use of restraints or confinement; use of medications that sedate or cause harm; malnourishment to the body, due to lack of food and shouting for no reason.

Indifference and neglect

Neglect and Self Neglect, failure to meet the physical and emotional needs of an older person.  Health needs not attended to; like depriving them of medicines, doctors, or hospital appointments, Inadequate food, clothing or shelter i.e. forcing them to eat stale food so that food is not wasted; lack of social contact and support; depriving them of regular showers or change of clothes due to water and electricity consumption.

Going through neglect, and denied common necessities, they feel isolated, ignored, and discarded which leads to self-neglect.

This is another reason why they give up hope and confidence in themselves which sometimes leads to suicide.

Institutional Abuse is a policy or accepted practice within an organisation that causes harm to people or disregards a person’s rights. This can sometimes be a one-off occurrence, other times it can be repeated over a period: inappropriate rationing of continence products, inflexible routines e.g. dress for breakfast before a certain time. This abuse may occur in rehabilitation and continuing care wards, daycare, emergency and outpatient departments, and any other area where the care of older people is provided.

Sadly, most of the time abuse goes unreported, especially in some communities or cultures, where it is considered a stigma. It has been estimated that only 16% of all abuse cases come to the attention of service agencies that can assist the older person to safety. 

About Shanti Niwas Charitable Trust

We work with senior citizens of Indian and South Asian origin.

Shanti Niwas Charitable Trust provides a service called ‘Khushi’ (Kind, Heal, Unite, Support, Humble, Inspire) which is Elder Abuse Neglect and Prevention Services, Ears Elder Abuse Response Service (contracted by the Ministry of Social Development). These services help seniors live with profound dignity and good quality of life.

Shanti Niwas Services

Positive Ageing Programmes: We conduct programmes at our Onehunga facility for seniors aged 65+ and disabled members. We have Drop-in-Centres in Northshore, Henderson, Manurewa, and Balmoral.

Dosti Visiting Services: This is a culturally appropriate and confidential volunteer service for seniors who are socially isolated, and housebound which also helps to negate elder abuse. Our services are free and confidential.

Service to Elders is the Mantra of Shanti Niwas Charitable Trust

Shanti Niwas Emergency Housing: We provide our seniors with emergency housing in case they need to avail of it for a temporary purpose.

Caring Callers: We have active seniors who call the socially isolated and homebound senior weekly to find out about their wellbeing.

Advocacy such as Home Care, Total Mobility Cards, Medical Alarm, Applications for Social Housing, WINZ benefits, Food Parcels and so on

Advice to families      

And most importantly, if you see other seniors being abused, report the matter to the Seniors Helpline 0800-03266865 or Shanti Niwas Charitable Trust.

Verona Sequeira: 021-2592114; Email: Verona.sequeira@shantiniwas.org.nz

It is common to have mixed feelings about speaking up, especially when the abuser is a person you know and trust such as family. But it is your right to feel safe.  Shanti Niwas has a responsibility to work with families who will listen, explain, and protect you. We also keep your values and beliefs close at heart, thus making our service very confidential.